Saying Hello & Goodbye
by chameleonwho3
Summary: What happens to the Doctor after the time reaper eats him? This is from the point of view of the Doctor, and what happens to him after being eaten.


**Author's Note: **Hi, so I was watching Father's Day and the story just kind of popped into my head, it's kind of angsty, but then it gets better... hope you like it! This story doesn't have a beta either, just to point it out.

**Disclaimer: **Nope, nothing.

Saying Hello and Goodbye

As soon as the baby was in Rose's arms he knew that the reapers were going to get in.

"Rose! No!" he cried as he jerked the baby away from her, but a reaper had already appeared within the vicinity of the church. He shoved the innocent child back into Jackie's arms and thought on his feet, "Everyone! Behind me!" He stared off at no point in particular, he had to choose, Rose or him, who would he sacrifice? He couldn't let her go. She was the one who had brought him here. She was the one who had made him a better man. No, she wasn't going to die today. He thought back to how the Dalek had revealed what he had kept bottled up inside since he had first told her run. How Rose always stood for what she thought was right. Why had he given in to her pleas to let her try one more time? Why did he have to have fallen for this ordinary girl, but she wasn't ordinary, she was his Rose. He knew why everyone always thought that they were a couple and he didn't do anything about it. He loved Rose Tyler. He had made up his mind.

The Doctor looked over to her and saw how much fear and confusion and sadness was being contained in her. He looked back to the reaper, as he ushered more people behind him and he felt her hand on his shoulder.

"I'm the oldest thing in here." He said staring up at the creature. He walked forward as calmly as he could and waited for the reaper to consume him.

"Doctor!" Rose called and he heard how terrified she was at losing him. The Doctor raised his hands to his face not wanting to see the snapping jaw at the center of the brute's stomach, concentrating on the sound of Rose's voice as he felt the tiny daggers dig into him as he was pulled inside.

The Doctor opened his eyes and looked around for Rose and then looked down. He saw her jean jacket, raspberry colored shirt, black sweats, and white trainers. He was Rose. He was in her mind, and he could feel everything that she was feeling, see everything she was seeing, hear everything she was hearing and thinking. He was trapped.

He felt terror and then a burning fury mixed with a curious feeling… love. Rose was frozen in disbelief so he couldn't move either. He watched as the reaper flew straight through the appearing TARDIS making it stop materializing, he swore as the key fell to the spongy red carpet. Then he felt himself flying forward, running toward the spot the TARDIS had just been. He felt despair and hatred. Both were still mixed with that emotion, love. He was kneeling down and picking up the key. Immediately a stream of memories of the two of them, he and Rose, flooded through. He felt the sorrow and love increase when the memory of the Dalek, only a few days ago when his feelings for her had been revealed by the pepper pot shaped alien. Then he realized that she loved him. Oh. How was he going to tell her let alone show her that he loved her? How was she go-

The thought was cut short when he heard Rose's voice speaking,

"Cold. He's cold." She said softly, and he felt her grip the key even tighter, trying to hold onto him, "Oh, my God, he's dead." He felt her struggling to grasp that he was gone and that idea being completely crumpled by disbelief. He smiled sadly, knowing that she may never see him again.

He felt Pete's hand on Rose's shoulder and he wanted him to be able to hear because he was shouting with all his might, "Don't touch her! Leave her alone! Let her have some peace!" then he had whispered, "It's okay Rose. I'm here. I… I… I lo… I lo… I… I… I love you…" his tongue felt like lead as attempted to comfort her telepathically, but with out success. He had no connection to her what so ever. They were together yet completely separated.

"It's all my fault…" Rose whispered sagely looking back at her father, "Both of you… all of you…" her voice cracked and the Doctor felt the weight of it come hurtling down on him, "the whole world…" he felt the guilt rise up, but it wasn't her guilt, it was his. It hadn't been her fault; it had been his. He should never have agreed to take her to see her father before he died, so he wouldn't be alone. If he hadn't they wouldn't have had that argument earlier. He thought back on it. He remembered as soon as he had taken the key he felt guilty; he wanted to undo that moment. He wanted to make that argument disappear, especially when Rose had called after him, "I know how sad you are. You'll be back in a minute. Or you'll hang around outside the TARDIS waiting for me. And I'll make you wait a long time!" she hadn't known how true those words had been as he had stormed past her. She was the first of his companions to truly understand him like that.

Pete's arms enveloped Rose in a hug and all the Doctor wanted to do was storm outside and be eaten… again… or better yet, yell at the stupid reapers for existing, but there was nothing, absolutely nothing that he could do.

The light faded a bit as a cloud passed overhead and the "bacteria of time" were rattling at the stained glass windows. The Doctor stared around the room, watching people cling to each other, not wanting the moment to end.

"This is it. There's nothing we can do. This is the end." Bev said, looking Rose in the eye, clammy with anxiety. Pete unlatched his tight grip around his daughter and the Doctor let out a big sigh as Rose looked towards the window showing the shadows of reapers flapping past. He heard their claws, grating like a dagger digging into wood, against the stone exterior of the church. Pete really had to hurry up and figure out what he had to do, otherwise the Doctor was stuck as a phantom floating about inside of Rose's head for the rest of eternity.

He felt Rose plop down dejectedly onto a wooden seat and felt her emotions coursing through her. Then something strange appeared. It must have been a dream she had had about the two of them. He watched the vision appear slowly, he knew that it must have taken place right after the meeting with the infamous Dalek because Adam was there, snoring on the jump seat just as he had that day.

_Rose looked up at him shyly and blushed, playing with a strand of her unkempt, wavy, blonde hair. _

_"You know what the Dalek said?" she trailed off nervously. He leant against one of the coral struts, and nodded his head slowly, "Was it… was... was it…" she stammered, "Was it true?" she looked down, hiding her rosy face behind her locks. Before she knew what was happening he was in front of her, caressing her cheek with his hand. She closed her eyes and leaned into it, wanting this to continue forever. He moved his hand to the back of her head and brought her lips to his. He kissed her gently and then she was kissing him back, her hands rested over his hearts and he pulled her closer, putting one of his hands on the small of her back. The kisses weren't hurried, but soft and wanting, her arms had hooked themselves around his neck and both of his arms were grasping her waist to him. He pulled away slowly and whispered into her ear, "Yes."_

_Then Rose's lips were crashing against his and he was snogging her with the same intensity. She opened her mouth in invitation-_

The Doctor snapped out of Rose's dream much to his disappointment, the dream had almost felt real, to hear Pete's voice, "The Doctor really cared about you…" He looked at the ginger haired man in the purple shirt and agreed silently, "He didn't want you to go through it again if there was another way. Now there isn't." he had felt hope surge through Rose until she hear "now there isn't". He felt Rose stand up,

"What you talking about?" she said in an almost whisper.

"The car that should've killed me, love." He explained, pulling on his grey jacket, "It's here." The Doctor felt Rose's heart fall, heading toward breaking down, she knew that she was going to lose the two men she loved in her life, "The Doctor worked it out way back, but he, er, he tried to protect me." To Rose this was all impossible and tears had started to well up in her eyes. He had tried to keep her father alive, for Rose's sake, but then he had been eaten and there was nothing he could do. The only way out of this now was for Pete to get hit by that car, "Still, he's not in charge anymore. I am." Pete continued.

"But you can't…" Rose finally managed. From within her head he felt all of the torture this day was causing her. As soon as Pete did his job, he knew he would be free, and the thought of Rose having to watch her father die for a second time killed his heart, but at least this time she could be with him, so he wouldn't die alone.

"Who am I, love?" Pete asked stroking her face. Rose smiled slightly as she whispered,

"My Daddy." The Doctor felt every brush of Pete's thumb against Rose's soft face and he knew that this act would help her through what was about to come. As he looked around, out of the back of her head and over Pete's shoulder he noticed Jackie had been watching this exchange with a bit of remorse playing on her face as she walked up to them. She wanted answers, and she would get them now, and the Doctor knew it.

"Jackie... look at her. She's ours." Pete told her removing his palm from Rose's cheek. She looked back and forth between the two of them and the Doctor saw that the truth was finally seeping in as Rose tried to smile, her lips fighting against it.

"Oh, God..." Jackie whispered and threw her arms around Rose's neck and Rose grasped her mother tightly, clamping her eyes shut, wanting her mum to never let go. The Doctor sighed sadly, hoping this would help Rose too. They released each other and Jackie turned to face her husband.

"I'm meant to be dead, Jackie. You're gonna get rid of me at last." Pete joked looking down at his feet.

"Don't say that." Jackie choked. Another flood of grief washed over the Doctor, stronger then the last four or five times.

"For once in your life, trust me. It's got be done." He told her, looking straight into her eyes. "You've got to survive, because you've got to bring up our daughter." he turned his head to Rose before pulling Jackie's lips to his, a lingering, loving kiss, a kiss of goodbye. He turned to Rose and her tears started to spill over and the Doctor wished, oh he wished with all his might that he could be with her right then so that he could pull her into a hug and let her cry all she wanted, just so long as she was crying into him. He hated that Rose had to be alone.

"I never read you those bedtime stories. I never took you on those picnics. I was never there for you." Pete said simply, looking at her tear streaked face.

"You would've been." She cried. The sobs she was holding back burned her throat as she sniffled and more tears trickled down her cheeks. The Doctor felt the panic that was building up. She didn't want to lose her father, not after only having spent the afternoon with him.

"But I can do this for you. I can be a proper dad to you now." He nodded; tears had started welling up in his own eyes as well.

"But it's not fair." Rose sniffled and choked. The Doctor hated all the sorrow that was being piled up on top of his Rose; she was being suffocated. All the happy moments she had had with her dad that day were being snuffed out under all of the weight. She was starting to snap. Pete smiled, his eyes shining,

"I've had all these extra hours. No one else in the world has ever had that. And on top of that..." he brushed her hair out of her face, "I get to see you." The tears were rolling faster and faster down Rose's features. "And you're beautiful." She nodded slowly, accepting his words, with a pained smile as she leaned into the palm of his hand, "How lucky am I, eh?" he took his hand away and got ready to leave, "So, come on... do as your dad says." Rose wiped her nose on her sleeve and turned away. The Doctor had watched them, tears starting to form in his own eyes, slowly but surely, the rare occurrence was taking place.

Rose slipped her fingers into the neck of the vase and lifted it up, holding the bottom with her other hand.

"Are you going to be there for me, love?" Pete asked her, taking "that stupid vase" from her hands. She nodded slowly and sniffled again. He held the back of her head and looked her directly in the eye, "Thanks for saving me." He spoke softly and with that, he pulled Jackie and Rose to him, holding onto then tightly. Rose squeezed her eyes shut and the Doctor knew that she wanted this all just to stop. That she wanted her mum and dad to be there for her, always, but she knew that that wasn't going to happen.

Pete pushed through the church's big, black, wooden doors and ran. Rose followed him to the door, but only that far. The Doctor knew that she couldn't bring herself to watch as the white car screeched and the driver covered his eyes. She heard the thump and the vase shatter, but she still wasn't able to look over. She waited with closed eyes, breathing in and out, in and out, waiting for someone to come and tell her it was okay.

The reapers disappeared slowly. They had fixed the wound in time by having what had happened originally, happen again.

The Doctor felt himself slowly flow back to his own body, which had materialized soundlessly on the gravel path. He stood up and walked silently over to Rose, who still had her eyes clamped shut. He placed his hand gently on Rose's shoulder and she snapped her head to face his. He looked into her tear filled eyes and told her one thing, the thing she had come here to do in the first place.

"Go to him. Quick." He said softly and then she ran. She ran to her father, who was lying in the middle of the road, fighting for breath. The Doctor watched as she kneeled beside Pete, grasped his hand and lifted his head off the ground slightly. He saw her smile sadly and Pete attempt to do like wise as he searched her face, he needed to see as much of it as possible. He let out one last breath and his eyes slid shut. Rose lay him down gently and stroked his cold face, the Doctor could tell as he watched her from the other side of the car that had killed Pete, that she wanted him to just jump up and say everything's all right. She looked down at her father's peaceful expression and kissed his forehead, before standing up and walking back to the Doctor who was waiting to envelope her in his arms. He held put his hand and she took it as they walked slowly across the street to the familiar blue police box that was waiting for them.

Once they were inside, the Doctor slid his arms around Rose and she collapsed into his embrace. She snaked her arms around his neck and just leaned against his jumper and leather jacket. He leaned down and kissed the top of her bleached head. He held her until, not paying attention to how much time had passed which was unusual for him, being a Time Lord and all. She raised her head so that she could look into the depths of his icy blue eyes. He looked back at her and ever so slowly he leaned closer to her, giving her the opportunity to move away, but she didn't. He pressed his lips to hers gently, savoring it. Then she was kissing him back. The kisses weren't hurried, but soft and languid, they knew without saying how the other felt. Slowly the Doctor pulled away, leaning his forehead against Rose's.

"I… I… I lo… I lo… I… I… I love you…" he stammered, forcing the words out. Rose smiled, poking her tongue between her teeth and she kissed once gently.

"I know." She whispered, "I love you too Doctor." And with that Rose pulled The Doctor down to her by the collar of his jacket, crashing her lips to his. The Doctor pulled her close again, rubbing circles into the small of her back. She sighed into his mouth and unhooked her arms from his neck and slid them around his waist. She opened her mouth and their kiss quickly escalated. She pulled away in need for air and they just held each other again.

"Where d'you want to go now?" he whispered into her hair. She looked up with a cheeky grin on her face.

"Any where…" she paused as her grin was replaced by a slight frown, "As long as it won't remind me of Daddy…" she whispered. He placed a sweet kiss on her mouth,

"Okay." He reassured her. And they held on to each other until the TARDIS hummed angrily at them to get some sleep. But even then they grinned at each other and walked down the corridor hand in hand.


End file.
